This is what my dog knows.

1. The reason we have a cat is so I can eat it's food and also eat the nice warm cookies it leaves behind in the litter box.
   

2. When my human leaves the room they are probably going to disappear so I had better follow closely behind at all times.
   

3. When you have to throw up it will make you feel better if you throw up on the clean carpet.
   

4. Don't ever turn your back on the vacuum, it is out to kill you.
   

5. When food is left on the table or counter it is really meant for you, if it wasn't they would have buried it in the backyard.
   

6. The mailman and garbage man are really out to kill you.
   

7. Squirrels are little monsters that must be destroyed at all cost..., if you can catch them.
   

8. Our human's like it when we roll in dead things, I mean who wouldn't.
   

9. Don't let a fly's size fool you, they are out to kill you, but do make a tasty snack.
   

10. Why do you need to drink water out of a bowl when you have fresh cold water in the toilet.
    

11. Always greet humans by putting your nose up their rear-end, that way you know if they are friendly or out to kill you. This friendly greeting will usually bring it out in them.
    

12. When getting ready to go for a ride and your human forgets something back in the house, when they get out jump on the door handle and lock the doors. When they come back wag your tail and jump up and down and act like you don't know why they are so upset.
    

13. Don't you wish you could read human's minds, poor pitiful things.
    

Shared by Rosanne Cleveland-King
                   Shado Run